Murphy’s law
If anything can go wrong, it will.
O’Tool’s commentary on Murphy’s law
Murphy was an optimist.
The unspeakable law
As soon as you mention something... if it’s good, it goes away; if it’s bad, it happens.
Howe’s law
Every man has a scheme that will not work.
Etorre’s observation
The other line moves faster.
Law of selective gravity
An object will fall so as to do the most damage.
Jenning’s corollary
The chance of the bread falling with the buttered side down
is directly proportional to the cost of the carpet.
Gordon’s first law
If a research project is not worth doing at all, it is not worth doing well.
Boren’s first law
When in doubt, mumble.
The golden rule of arts and sciences
Whoever has the gold makes the rules.
Barth’s distinction
There are two types of people:
those who divide people into two types, and those who don’t.
Segal’s law
A man with one watch knows what time it is.
A man with two watches is never sure.